Friday, August 3, 2012

You Might Be a Writer, If......

My kid asked me the other day, how did I know I was a writer?  I hastened to stuff all the smart-alec responses back down.  I answered him, then laughed hilariously in my head when I ran down the list of the answers I had to quell.  Of course, right about that time I thought, this would make a great blog post.  So, without further ado, and with the most enormous apology to Jeff Foxworthy, I present The List:
  1. If you have to pull off to the side of the road to poke a great book idea into your smart phone...you might be a writer 
  2. If every person you have ever known appears in some form in your books...you might be a writer.
  3.  If during a natural disaster, your order of importance is kids, laptop, and THEN husband...you might be a writer
  4. If you take your laptop on vacation and swear up and down you find writing your opus in the sun "relaxing"....you might be a writer.
  5. If the word "query" strikes greater fear in your heart than the word "audit"....you might be a writer.
  6. If you realize too late that you murmured your approval while in a caffeine-fueled writing-trance for what turns out to be a water hose fight INSIDE the garage....you might be a writer.
  7. If your heart stops beating if the area code (212) shows up on your cell phone screen....you might be a writer.
  8. If you watch credits roll on a movie and scan them for cool-sounding names....you might be a writer.
  9. If the idea that Snooki has "written" a book repulses you.....you might be a writer.
  10. If your recipe cards are two pages long and have flowery descriptors, like "glistening" and "unctuous" and "playful"....you might be a writer.
  11. If there is not enough room for you in the memo portion of your checks....you might be a writer.
  12. If your thank-you cards turn into thank-you letters, and your thank-you letters turn into pamphlets....you might be a writer.
  13. If you plan family vacations around NaNoWriMo.....you might be a writer.
  14. If you can't afford new shoes, but find $400 for a writer's conference....you might be a writer.
  15. And finally, if the words "the end" give sweeter satisfaction than, well, you know.....then my friend, YOU ARE SO A WRITER!

How bout you guys?  Got any I missed?  I'd love to hear them!


16 comments:

  1. If you go on a vacation and find yourself thinking "this would make a great setting..." and then find yourself waving for your family to get out of the way whenever you take your pictures...

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  2. If the cashier at the grocery store refuses to let you use the double coupon because it is out of date and she ends up dead, in your next book...

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  3. If your Starbucks order isn't made to your liking and you threaten to blow up the building...

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    1. In a book, right? *backs slowly away from the coffee counter*

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  4. If you tell your dog, who's dancing around obviously in need of going pee-pee, let me finish this sentence and two paragraphs later you finally take him/her out....

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  5. Ha ha, if you find yourself narrating scenes in your head as you watch them unfold around you...ie..the grocery store, your living room, etc...you might be a writer...

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  7. If you, like my best friend, have about a million voices in your head all clamouring for attention and you have to MAKE them wait their turn...

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  8. Samantha, this is a WONDERFUL post! Congrats on being an excellent writer.:)

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  9. If you hear of a tragedy and two thoughts run simultaneously through your head:
    1. Gee, that's awful - poor you.
    2. Hmm...interesting...now how can I use this in a story?

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  10. I loved this! And yes, I plan around Nanowrimo :)

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  11. LOL! Loved this post! I was basically nodding to every single thing on your list. :D

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  12. If your stories give you story ideas.

    Great post!

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